I just had to post this today because it ties in so perfectly with yesterday's post.

http://yourot.com/parenting-club/2016/5/16/why-our-children-are-so-bored-at-school-cant-wait-and-
get-so-easily-frustrated

Yesterday in a conversation with one of my daughters, we were discussing some "hard things" required of her by her parents, when she was still living at home, to which she responded. Thank you for training me (and I would add loving her enough) to become a responsible adult!

Again the question posed yesterday - Are we enabling our children or are we empowering them?
Would love some of your comments after you read the above article.

–  More quotes from Raising an Original  Chapter 5 – It’s Not Just About Protecting Them Psychologist Chris Meno of Indiana University warns about the long-term effects of helicopter parenting: “The fruits of parental over-involvement include higher levels of anxiety and depression among adult children.  When children aren’t given the space to struggle through things on their own, they don’t learn to problem-solve very well.  They don’t learn to be confident in their own abilities, and it can affect their self-esteem.  The other problem with never having to struggle is that you never experience failure and can develop an overwhelming fear of failure and of disappointing others.  Both the low self-confidence and the fear of failure can lead to depression or anxiety.”

“I (the author) come from a family line that’s made worry, fear, and anxiety an art form.  It all came from a place of love.  From a place of responsibility and caring and heart.  But it was fear, all the same.”   

      PROGRESS AWAY FROM FEAR.  PROGRESS TOWARD TRUSTING GOD. 

“While I certainly want my kids to look back on their younger years with joy and happiness and celebration, I also know the value of difficult experiences, frustrating challenges, and overwhelming pressure.  It’s important to realize when we’re veering into helicopter hovering and mom-driven or dad-driven micromanaging.  We need to be wary of laying a cushioned and silk-tangle trap of ease and entitlement for our kids.  And we need to be honest.”

Baby Turtles – The author and her husband were at a resort where baby turtles were to be released to go to the ocean.  “The director of the release program drew a long line in the sand, marking the starting point for the upcoming journey.  He explained that the turtles needed to make their own way down to the water, that we were not to carry them to the surf.  We then began to pick up the baby turtles from the crate and set them on the sand at that line, heads facing the sea.  By then, a few other guests had made their way over to our impromptu zoological lesson and joined us in placing baby turtles on the sand.  As if a horn had sounded to start the race, little turtles began scrambling toward the waves, scaling big clumps of seaweed and pushing their way through uneven sand.  Some reached the water quickly; others moved at a more leisurely pace.  A few got a little confused.  A few stopped.  A few of the turtles seemed exhausted, overwhelmed by the challenges of the terrain.  Others got turned around, heading away from the sea or scrambling in a parallel line to the water.  We watched, a little worried, until dusk began to settle.  Finally, one of the resort guests couldn’t take it anymore.  She scooped up one of the stragglers and began to carry him down to the water, unable to bear the uncertainty.  One of the employees in charge of the release called after her, motioning for her to put the turtle down, but her overwhelming concern overshadowed his instructions.  As she gently placed the turtle in the shallows, her husband caught up with her and reminded her that she wasn’t supposed to help the turtles.  She saw her actions as a kindness.  (But was it?)

That trip from the sand to the water?  That’s critical turtle training ground.  It’s what gives baby turtles a better chance of survival.  The best conditions possible had been created by monitoring the nest and timing the release at sunset when predatory birds and scavengers are not as active.  But once those conditions had been achieved, newly hatched turtles need the trek to the water to strengthen their flippers, to practice the motion that will be required once they hit the water.  They need the experience of heading accurately toward the shore, even if it takes them a bit to figure it out.  These moments of struggle in the sand of their childhood would serve them well during their next hundred years of survival.    What an overprotective heart saw as too hard or too cruel or too tough is actually exactly what a baby turtle needed to up his chances of survival.  THE STRENGTH IS IN THE STRUGGLE.

It’s time to land the helicopter.  It’s time to untangle the snares of fear.  It’s time to trust.  For our original kids to reach their full potential, we need to model vision, courage, and daring.  Ask yourself, am I enabling or empowering? 

Janene sent these nature drawings 
from 
David
Abigail, 
Eliza, 
Maddy 
and I think one of these
she did herself!

Thank you for sharing Janene!

This month my study is nature which includes the topics of ‘a love of nature’ and ‘a drawing of nature.’  This Friday, when the "greats" come over, I hope for all of us to do some 'drawing of nature.' If your children draw something of nature, please post it so we can all enjoy it!

The objective of this months study is to learn how to nurture a child’s natural love of nature and how to give them eyes to ‘see.’ “Nature Study is emotional -- Science is intellectual. They're two completely different approaches. In time, heart and mind will work together, but heart work comes first. Unfortunately, in our excitement over science, we've left the study of nature behind. Children are taught the scientific method in kindergarten, but they have little awareness of the miracles of nature that surround them. The job of the mother is to open a child's eyes and especially his heart so he can 'feel' all the lessons Mother Nature teaches.”– Marlene Peterson

I am including a couple of video clips – one is entitled “The Wonderment”

https://vimeo.com/89042475

and the other is “Technology Addicted Children.” 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88o1TccaJw4&feature=youtu.be

Also, there is a longer clip that you could simply play for the beauty of the scenes and the relaxing music.  It is something you could play to bring down the noise level in the home if needed. It plays for about three hours but you can stop it any time you want, of course.  :-)  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_V_RZoUUScY 

And here an interesting article entitled “How Nature Makes Kids Calmer, Healthier, Smarter”

 http://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/family-life/nature 

"If the trees and flowers, the clouds and the wind, all tell wonderful stories to the child, he has sources of happiness of which no power can deprive him."

                   --Flora Cooke

I have thoroughly enjoyed my first phase of study of “Education of 

the Heart.”  The first phase has been an emphasis on mothers, to 

help feel our worth and value as a mother (and grandmother).  I 

truly believe that no one is qualified to do the work you are 

called to do as the mother to the children our loving Father sent 

to you.   This first phase also includes an introduction to the 

ongoing study of the basics of heart-based education.  Some of the 

changes I have personally made, since beginning this journey, is 

adding some classical music stations to my Pandora.  Classical 

music touches our hearts and lifts our spirits – not all of it, of 

course, but much of it does.  I invite you to try some on for size.  

Here is one of my favorites for liveliness 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEeag0Lzm7k and here is one of my 

favorites for peace. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgpJVI3tDbY  The 

other thing I have enjoyed is watching short clips on mothers. 

https://vimeo.com/76834417  Lastly, I just finished reading “Mother 

Carey’s Chickens”, a delightful book by Kate Douglas Smith Wiggin (author of

Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm) A quote from the book - "By and 

by there came along a flock of petrels, who are Mother Carey's own 

chickens.... They flitted along like a flock of swallows, 

hopping and skipping from wave to wave, lifting their little feet 

behind them so daintily that Tom fell in love with them at once."  

definition of petrels - any of various widespread small dark petrels (family Hydrobatidae) 

that typically return to land only to nest usually in burrows —also called 

Mother Carey's chicken.  

http://blogs.tallahassee.com/community/2016/05/03/storm-petrels-a-life-at-sea/

This is not a book about chickens or petrels in the literal sense, it is a book about a mother who, not only nurtures 

her own children, but reaches out to others as well.  She is widowed early on in the book and faces her challenges 

with courage and fortitude and a great deal of love.

                                                        Ezra and Maddie loving their chicken